Disney Remake Marathon - Beauty and the Beast

Tale as old as time

True as it can be

Barely even friends

Then somebody bends

Unexpectedly

Just a little change

Small to say the least

Both a little scared

Neither one prepared

Beauty and the Beast

Today’s Disney Live action remake is Beauty and the Beast, the first of the more modern Disney films to get the live action treatment. The original Disney Beauty and the Beast came out in the early 90s, this came out in 2017, only just over 20 years later, both versions are firmly remembered by people, even fondly so in some cases.   

In the director’s chair for this one is Bill Condon, who’d recently directed the Breaking Dawn Twilight movies. For balance I should also mention he directed Mr Holmes which I quite liked.

The film had quite a large budget, sources vary but it could well be as high as $250m, but the big investment paid off, with another $1bn hit. It seems as though no matter how much folks on the internet complain about remakes, they go out to see them anyway. We’ll see what happens when Mulan eventually makes it out to cinema [this joke was written before Mulan ended up becoming a Disney+ exclusive].

The film was successful critically but it’s been subject to some rather damning deconstruction post-release that this will be a part of.

The original Beauty and the Beast is a classic for a reason and it holds up rather well. The one song you remember from it is really good, the voice acting and the animation is at the high quality of Disney in the 90’s renaissance era.

A Strange Halloween 3 - Stranger Things Season 3 Episodes 3-4 (Netflix Retrospective)

Starcourt Mall, shiny and bold

Has shattered relationships, so I am told

Billy was a lifeguard, became a prophet

And Downtown stores aren’t making a profit

Hopper is upset his date didn’t show

As magnets stop, how? We don’t know

A radio message, a code in disguise

An enemy, Russian, one to despise 

But old threats are not out the game

Billy and his army of rats are to blame

The Mind Flayer is back, weak but still mean

We continue this plight on A Strange Halloween 

If that sounded a bit scatter-brained that’s only because that describes the last two episodes perfectly, still, they’ve scattered an entertaining series of clues for us to be engaged by along with some teen relationship drama. Let’s see how things continue…

Disney Remake Marathon - The Jungle Book

Rudyard Kipling’s The Jungle Book is clearly a favourite among Disney execs, despite them not owning exclusive rights to it. It got the animated treatment in 1967 and has had 3 live action films, one in 1994, another a mere 4 years later, and of course the big budget one in 2016.

Jon Favreau is at the Director’s helm for this one, he was the director of the first 2 Iron Man films so had some clout with Disney, not to mention experience handling special effects. He would later be one of the creators of the one bit of Disney Star Wars material that isn’t horribly divisive in the Mandalorian.

The film needed a sizeable budget to accommodate all the CG necessary for this production, and got $175m, the film made $966m at the box office and was well acclaimed by critics at the time of release.

The 1967 animated feature came after production budgets for animated features were slashed across the board, and this is very obvious in the film, a lot of animation is recycled and some of the faster-paced stuff looks like it has frames missing. It’s unfortunate as this one is somewhat reliant on cartoon slapstick, something that requires a fast pace. That said, the two songs you remember are just as entertaining, they have remembered how sound-effects work with the impacts feeling like they have impact now, the voice cast is on-point and the painted backdrops are beautiful to behold.

A Strange Halloween 3 - Stranger Things Season 3 Episodes 1-2 (Netflix Retrospective)

A lot can happen in a small town

When it’s connected to the upside-down

What began as a search for a lost child;

Became a horror show, deadly and wild 

Though the child in end was found

There still was danger around

And through the course of season 2

That threat began to rise anew 

Pushed back by force, its portal gone

A girl adopted; time moves on

But one summer will prove far from serene

For it’s Stranger Things on A Strange Halloween

It’s been a while since we last looked at Stranger Things. Season 3 was released in the summer of 2019. The trailers had bigged up a new shopping mall built in town of Hawkins, Starcourt. But there was very little plot actually teased, only the notion that Will wasn’t going to be put through the mill again this season. So with that in mind, let’s take a look at Stranger Things season 3 and see if lived up to the hype.

Disney Remake Marathon - Cinderella

Whilst Alice in Wonderland’s billion-dollar success got the ball rolling for live action Disney Remakes with big budgets and big actors, we wouldn’t see another one until 2014, with Maleficent, but I’m not covering Maleficent as part of this Marathon, as it doesn’t share its name with the original. Perhaps another time. With 2015 came of the remake of Cinderella, another adaptation of a book, maybe there’s a pattern here 

At the directors helm this time is Kenneth Branagh, who has certainly a mixed history with me. I liked his Murder on the Orient Express, was underwhelmed but not entirely displeased with Thor and then came Artemis Fowl… I don’t really need to say anymore, do I? Stay tuned for that review in 2021/2022.

The film didn’t have the budget of Tim Burton’s Alice, mostly because this shouldn’t need to create expansive worlds using special effects and made about $500m at the box office, a reasonable success for the house of mouse.

The original is another movie I’d describe as a 20-minute short stretched over 75 minutes. But with this it’s far easier to identify exactly what could’ve been cut. The cat and mouse chase scenes. Looney Tunes and MGM’s Tom and Jerry had cornered the market in this regard and their slapstick was lacklustre, missing the timing and sound of the true slapstick greats. But does the 2015 improve on this? Let’s take a look

Netflix Retrospective - Voltron: Legendary Defender Season 8 Episodes 1-3

I guess it’s time to put Voltron: Legendary Defender to bed. 

Barring a couple of problematic elements, s7 was still a solid season of television heading into the 8^th and final season. With most of the other antagonists defeated, it’s down to Honerva aka Haggar to finish the job. And she may just have found her greatest weapon, as when we left off, Voltron was attacked by a giant robotic monster piloted by an Altean. Season 8 has its own share of controversies but I’ll cover them at the end, for now let’s dive into…

Disney Remake Marathon - Alice in Wonderland

I’m not going to be doing another 4 horror films for Halloween, you want a horror show, you can just look at the latest news or your twitter feed for that. I will still be covering season 3 of Stranger Things and have a Halloween special but for the most part, I’m going to be doing something else.

Disney live action remakes have been a part of society since the 101 Dalmatians remake, but it was 2010 with the release of Alice in Wonderland where it was shown they could make big money, resulting in a slew of remakes and oh my god, Disney, make it stop.

I’m not gonna be covering the 101 Dalmatians remake at this time, but I will be covering all the Disney Live Action remakes of the 2010’s. Oh boy, this is gonna be a rough ride.

We start with… oh f*ck, Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland. OK, to Burton’s credit, he’s not a bad director. For all the problems I have with the Michael Keaton Batman run, it certainly captured the gothic look I’d expect of a gritty adaptation of the Dark Knight, Beetlejuice was weird but fun and I did like Mrs Peregrine’s home for Peculiar Children but oh man is he the wrong choice for this particular aesthetic.

Tim Burton’s style is dark and gritty. Wonderland is a place of magic, colour and madness, only one of those really appeals to Burton. As for the original, and I mean the Disney original, not the book… It’s fine, it’s not really my thing, I prefer a story with a bit more meat to it, but I understand why that isn’t the case here, unlike some people, which I’ll get to in a bit. It feels like a 20-minute short, stretched out to 75 minutes. And if that’s what I think of the original, imagine what I think of the nearly 2-hour long remake, let’s take a look.